Wednesday, October 28, 2009

I've Been Thinking...

Dangerous I know, but I have been thinking, and thought I'd share with you. so not fun, but I know it will be worth it, and I hope God allows us to look back one day and see what we were waiting for. As we are in this waiting stage of our life, I've been trying to figure out God, my first mistake. I've been asking why we're still here, doesn't He want us on the field? Doesn't He need us there? And God, being ever so the Gentleman, quietly reminds me that yes, He wants us on the field, but no, He doesn't need us. That may sound strange, but it's the truth...He doesn't need me. He loves those people more that I could ever love them, He is concerned for their salvation more than I could ever be. And here I am, the creation, telling the Creator what to do. Wow.

I've been doing some word studies - "peace", "patience", and "waiting". Most of the verses on waiting talk of keeping our mind fixed on Him. I've come to the conclusion that God has my best interest at heart. He is in control, and there is nothing (literally nothing) regarding these visas that I can do. So, everyday I wake up and leave it in His hands and do my best to keep my mind focused on Him. I'm by no means perfect, and there are some days where I start thinking about, then worrying about, then getting frustrated about it, and I have to stop and remind myself...God is in control...God is good.

I've learned that I have peace, yet I struggle with patience. Any thoughts on the difference or similarities?

I was listening to a Revive Our Hearts Podcast and she was talking about Psalm 23, how the Shepherd makes us to lie down in green pastures, and leads us beside the still waters. She mentioned how there is no recording in Scripture of Jesus running anywhere, the Bible talks of Him walking and sleeping. She wasn't insinuating that He was lazy, but that we are such a busy society. Even Martha nagged Jesus that her sister was busy sitting at His feet while she was doing everything else. I sometimes think (and I know I'm not the only one) that everything should happen faster, I know that God is ultimately in control of this visa, if He wanted us there we'd be there. We live in a fast-paced society...when our internet is slow, we get frustrated, when the people at the drive-thru is slow, we get frustrated, when the guy in front of us doesn't turn in time, and we're stuck at the red light, we get frustrated. I think the Lord is sending us messages all over the place to slow down.

So, I said all that to say this - I know where God wants us, and in His perfect timing we'll be there, but until then I'm doing my best to "Be still and know that I am God".

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

good thoughts! I prayed for you on my way to work this morning:)-Laura